Today I went to the bank and to WalMart and Maiya went along. When we left the house I once again turned the wrong way (I keep doing that!) and ended up not being on the right road. I learned the other day however, if I go straight across the wrong road and through the housing development across the road, I will come out where I need to be, so that is what I did. Maiya needless to say was confused. "This not the way to the bank" she informed me. I told her it was a different way, the scenic route, and that I really did know how to get there. She asked me if I knew how to get to Disney World (yes, on a plane) -- how about California (yes, on a plane too, although I was then told you could also get there by driving a car). Then as she was looking at the scenery, she said "I know where we are now -- this is Hokaphonia"!! (Hope I spelled that right!) I was told that Hokaphonia was really a pretty place with gas and houses and yards and the reason that she knows all this is because "I'm smart!" When we left the bank (yes, it is in Hokaphonia too) and were headed to WalMart, she asked me if we were going back to Texas or were we just going to stay in Hokaphonia. Then she said we better go back to Texas "coz that's where us house is".
So if you ever get bored or just want to take a little side trip, come get Maiya and she will take you to Hokaphonia -- or some other equally facinating place, I'm sure!! I know one thing -- you won't be bored!!
Monday, January 25, 2010
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Thoughts on Saturday morning
Well, I was hoping for a callback yesterday on the Thursday interview but so far, no call. Oh, well. Maybe they are trying to figure out what to do with me! I didn't get to talk to the admin person, only the nursing director (who, by the way, has only been on the job 2 weeks and couldn't tell me a thing about benefits, what the job was exactly that I was there to talk about, what areas it would cover, etc.). She was very enthusiastic and thought I would do "great helping with policy and procedure" issues, and other office work, but I think the job is field work. I am so torn, because I really don't want to do that anymore but am afraid if I don't take that kind of job if offered, I won't get a job. I am ready to "be grounded" somewhere and not have to learn all the streets and avenues and highways in some new town/city, and then travel around all day trying to find people.
Does that mean I really am getting old?
I am at the point where early retirement is beginning to look better and better. I could still find something part-time (there are a LOT of those jobs posted!) to supplement things for a few years, but the question is would I be able to manage financially, with rent, etc. as high as it is here. I definitely want my own place again, but need to be reasonable about it. It is something I think about though, that's for sure! And not because I'm not grateful and happy to have a place to live, but I am used to my independence and don't want to be a burden or disrupt anyone else's life either.
If there is anything good in all this, it is that I am able to be here and help out -- Janie had a super bad day this week and was on the sofa or in the bed all day, so I pretty much took care of things until Kyle got home. Might not sound like a big thing, but at least I felt useful. Sometimes I don't -- feel useful I mean. I try my best not to "butt in" when it comes to cleaning up, telling the kids what to do, and so on. That's not my place. It's hard because in my thinking it's taking some of the work off Janie & Kyle. But I am afraid they think it is butting in or being critical. So I try not to "do" if they don't ask. Little things like changing diapers or making lunch are no problem. It's the other things I hesitate about.
David keeps telling me to "look up, be patient, and have faith" and I know that's what I need to do, but it sure is hard not to get discouraged sometimes.
It's the weekend -- I'll start all over on Monday with all this. Maybe it will be my week!!
Chin up!! (or should that be "chins"?) :)
Does that mean I really am getting old?
I am at the point where early retirement is beginning to look better and better. I could still find something part-time (there are a LOT of those jobs posted!) to supplement things for a few years, but the question is would I be able to manage financially, with rent, etc. as high as it is here. I definitely want my own place again, but need to be reasonable about it. It is something I think about though, that's for sure! And not because I'm not grateful and happy to have a place to live, but I am used to my independence and don't want to be a burden or disrupt anyone else's life either.
If there is anything good in all this, it is that I am able to be here and help out -- Janie had a super bad day this week and was on the sofa or in the bed all day, so I pretty much took care of things until Kyle got home. Might not sound like a big thing, but at least I felt useful. Sometimes I don't -- feel useful I mean. I try my best not to "butt in" when it comes to cleaning up, telling the kids what to do, and so on. That's not my place. It's hard because in my thinking it's taking some of the work off Janie & Kyle. But I am afraid they think it is butting in or being critical. So I try not to "do" if they don't ask. Little things like changing diapers or making lunch are no problem. It's the other things I hesitate about.
David keeps telling me to "look up, be patient, and have faith" and I know that's what I need to do, but it sure is hard not to get discouraged sometimes.
It's the weekend -- I'll start all over on Monday with all this. Maybe it will be my week!!
Chin up!! (or should that be "chins"?) :)
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Rays of Sunshine
You know, sometimes when you get "down", God sends rays of sunshine into your life to brighten things up. I've got lots of them -- Kyle, Janie & the kids here in "Teckis", my loving family & "old" friends in VA, my faithful and patient Cleo (my cat) -- but I have to say that right now (don't anyone get offended here!) my two biggest rays are named Maiya and Cora.
Maiya entertains constantly with her never-ending talking and her vivid imagination. We were so concerned when she was "littler" that she would never talk, but she sure makes up for it now! Never a silent moment unless she's asleep. Her stories are hilarious -- right now she is on a "my stepmother" kick and the other night she was telling us all about when she was little and lived in the forest by herself with just a fridge and some bacon. (Don't ask -- couldn't begin to tell you where it comes from!!) She loves dress-up and drawing, so maybe she'll be an author and write childrens books someday!
Cora is just a delight -- her facial expressions alone are so hilarious you have to laugh! She's not talking unless you count her very expressive babble, but even at that it sounds like conversation. I am trying to teach her words and "body parts" -- occasionally she will say Mama or Dada or this or Nana or bye or nite-nite, but seldom will repeat anything when you want her to "say it again". She will point to her nose or her eyes when asked ONCE but again, no repeats. She's smart -- will get a diaper or put things back where they belong, or numerous other things you tell her to do, but I suppose she is too busy walking, running, climbing stairs, and going in circles to bother with speech. The best part of my day is when she sees me in the mornings, gets a big grin on her face, and squeals. And when she climbs on my lap and gives me kisses.
So when I get really down about this job situation, all I have to do is spend some time with my sunshine rays, and I feel a lot better!
Try it -- you'll like it! But find your own -- you can't have mine!! Ha, ha!
Maiya entertains constantly with her never-ending talking and her vivid imagination. We were so concerned when she was "littler" that she would never talk, but she sure makes up for it now! Never a silent moment unless she's asleep. Her stories are hilarious -- right now she is on a "my stepmother" kick and the other night she was telling us all about when she was little and lived in the forest by herself with just a fridge and some bacon. (Don't ask -- couldn't begin to tell you where it comes from!!) She loves dress-up and drawing, so maybe she'll be an author and write childrens books someday!
Cora is just a delight -- her facial expressions alone are so hilarious you have to laugh! She's not talking unless you count her very expressive babble, but even at that it sounds like conversation. I am trying to teach her words and "body parts" -- occasionally she will say Mama or Dada or this or Nana or bye or nite-nite, but seldom will repeat anything when you want her to "say it again". She will point to her nose or her eyes when asked ONCE but again, no repeats. She's smart -- will get a diaper or put things back where they belong, or numerous other things you tell her to do, but I suppose she is too busy walking, running, climbing stairs, and going in circles to bother with speech. The best part of my day is when she sees me in the mornings, gets a big grin on her face, and squeals. And when she climbs on my lap and gives me kisses.
So when I get really down about this job situation, all I have to do is spend some time with my sunshine rays, and I feel a lot better!
Try it -- you'll like it! But find your own -- you can't have mine!! Ha, ha!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Records
Okay, so there are some records you really DON'T want to set -- like how many jobs can you be turned down for in one day. I win -- FOUR! I am honestly beginning to wonder what in the world is going on. I think a big part of it is my age. I know they are not allowed to discriminate but they find ways. Like the standard comment I'm getting, "your qualifications do not meet our criteria for the position". In a way I can understand -- they don't want to spend time and money training/orienting someone who may up and retire in 2 1/2 years. But hey, who says I'll retire then? I may like the job enough to stay for a long time! At least give me the chance.
I may have to retire -- then look at something part time to make up for what I lose by not waiting until I'm 66. It's not what I want, but who knows. Things keep going the way they are, I might not have a choice. I can't live here with the kids forever. Bless their hearts, they are doing what they can to help, but they have their own family to support and it wasn't meant to include a mother/mother-in-law.
I'm just frustrated, so you will have to forgive me and bear with me. This is something new for me to deal with and I'm doing the best I can at the moment. No one likes rejection, but in some situations it's harder to handle than others.
Oh, well. Like Scarlett said, "I'll think about that tomorrow"!
I may have to retire -- then look at something part time to make up for what I lose by not waiting until I'm 66. It's not what I want, but who knows. Things keep going the way they are, I might not have a choice. I can't live here with the kids forever. Bless their hearts, they are doing what they can to help, but they have their own family to support and it wasn't meant to include a mother/mother-in-law.
I'm just frustrated, so you will have to forgive me and bear with me. This is something new for me to deal with and I'm doing the best I can at the moment. No one likes rejection, but in some situations it's harder to handle than others.
Oh, well. Like Scarlett said, "I'll think about that tomorrow"!
Friday, January 15, 2010
The Good, the Bad, and the Waiting
Okay, two more interviews under my belt, which is good. Won't know for a week or two if I got either of them -- the waiting. No more interviews scheduled -- bad.
This all is just not going the way it was supposed to go (at least in MY plans!). I was supposed to come here, move into my little house near the kids, have Christmas, then get a job. Not happening!
All I can say is, God must have something else in mind that He hasn't let me know about or figure out yet. But human being that I am, I am getting frustrated and depressed waiting to find out what it is! I am glad I am here and able to help out with things (especially the grandkids), but I feel like I am being a "sponge" and a burden on everyone by not being able to "pay my own way" right now. This sitting around waiting is very hard -- I don't like not doing anything. As I've said before, not working and taking a break is nice, but enough already, where is the income??
At least tutoring starts again on Sunday -- not much but at least something coming in!!
Oh, and today is Jan. 15, so we are waiting to see if another notice goes up on the "cute little house" up the street! I don't mean to sound vindictive or evil, but if it's going to happen I hope it does before someone else moves in there. And in a way, it would serve the "landlady" right for not telling us about her problems up front and for obviously not using my rent and deposit to get herself out of trouble.
Okay, now I ask for forgiveness for all of that, but it's how I feel.
'Nuff said for now.
This all is just not going the way it was supposed to go (at least in MY plans!). I was supposed to come here, move into my little house near the kids, have Christmas, then get a job. Not happening!
All I can say is, God must have something else in mind that He hasn't let me know about or figure out yet. But human being that I am, I am getting frustrated and depressed waiting to find out what it is! I am glad I am here and able to help out with things (especially the grandkids), but I feel like I am being a "sponge" and a burden on everyone by not being able to "pay my own way" right now. This sitting around waiting is very hard -- I don't like not doing anything. As I've said before, not working and taking a break is nice, but enough already, where is the income??
At least tutoring starts again on Sunday -- not much but at least something coming in!!
Oh, and today is Jan. 15, so we are waiting to see if another notice goes up on the "cute little house" up the street! I don't mean to sound vindictive or evil, but if it's going to happen I hope it does before someone else moves in there. And in a way, it would serve the "landlady" right for not telling us about her problems up front and for obviously not using my rent and deposit to get herself out of trouble.
Okay, now I ask for forgiveness for all of that, but it's how I feel.
'Nuff said for now.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Rejected, dejected
Well, the job with the neurologist didn't work out. Said she really liked me for the job but the "no neuro experience and no chemo experience" kind of cancelled things out. Boo. I really liked her and thought I'd like working with her. Oh well, there's always tomorrow.
Went for an interview with a fairly new hospice today. Went well but I'm just not sure I want all that driving around in strange places anymore. Have an interview with a rehab hospital tomorrow -- again, it's fairly new, down side is that it's for 3rd shift (12 hours). That means on 3 or 4 at a time, which might not be bad because of the days off then, but it will mess up my tutoring and I'm not sure I'm up to 12 hour nights. But we'll see what they say. Getting to the point where I can't afford to be too awfully choosy!
So, just a little down today.
Did have a great lunch with Kyle, Janie, Maiya and Cora today though at a place called "RED HOT & BLUE". BBQ place with jazz theme. Great BBQ, & the ribs J&K had looked and smelled fantastic!! Need a second visit!
I think I'll have ice cream for dinner tonight!!
Went for an interview with a fairly new hospice today. Went well but I'm just not sure I want all that driving around in strange places anymore. Have an interview with a rehab hospital tomorrow -- again, it's fairly new, down side is that it's for 3rd shift (12 hours). That means on 3 or 4 at a time, which might not be bad because of the days off then, but it will mess up my tutoring and I'm not sure I'm up to 12 hour nights. But we'll see what they say. Getting to the point where I can't afford to be too awfully choosy!
So, just a little down today.
Did have a great lunch with Kyle, Janie, Maiya and Cora today though at a place called "RED HOT & BLUE". BBQ place with jazz theme. Great BBQ, & the ribs J&K had looked and smelled fantastic!! Need a second visit!
I think I'll have ice cream for dinner tonight!!
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
"Catch-up"
No, not the red stuff you put on fries, just time to update all that's been going on. I know it's been about a month and a half since I posted anything, but then I'm not sure anyone even reads this stuff.
We made the trip to "Tekis" -- took 3 days instead of the planned 2, partly because I have a son who doesn't like to get up early, and partly because half way here, we lost a tire off the trailer carrying my truck!! Thank goodness it had 4 and we managed to pull into a hotel parking lot with it. Called Penske, and they replaced the trailer, but we had to wait nearly 3 hours for them to get the new one to us, so we just stayed where we were overnight. We were hoping to get a lot further that first day, but didn't happen. Oh, well. We finally got here, and safely, and that's what matters.
Moved into "my" neat little rental house on Monday (30th). 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, yard, etc. I really liked it and the "landlady" seemed really nice -- young, 3 kids, seemed really happy to have me in the house. It was a 3 minute walk from the kids, no major streets so the little ones could come over whenever with no worries. Had a room "set up" just for them. I was getting settled in and enjoying it until about a month later we came home from a job interview and found a notice from the bank on the door!! After some investigating, we found out the nice landlady (who had oddly enough moved to Ohio before Christmas!!) was 3 months behind in her mortgage payments and had 15 days to catch up or they were going to start foreclosure proceedings!!! K&J talked with several folks whose advice they trusted and the consensus was I needed to get out before I got locked out. So, rented a storage place, nice folks from their church came, moved my things out of the house and into the storage ALL IN ONE DAY. The next day we took enough stuff to K&J's for me to furnish a room (sorry Meg!) and stay with them for now. Of course, the nice landlady denied the "arrears", said her finances were none of our business, refused to refund my deposit because I "walked out" on the lease (of which I never did get a signed copy), and has already put the house on the rental market again! Maybe we did jump the gun, maybe she did catch up, but the trust factor is gone. How could I ever be comfortable there wondering constantly if she was behind again and looking over my shoulder for the bank to come lock up the house?
It is probably a blessing in disguise -- probably should have just moved in here to start with, but hindsight is always 20/20. The job situation did not pan out the way I planned -- still looking as a matter of fact! I guess I thought I'd come out here and just "fall into" something with no trouble. Didn't happen, still hasn't happened, although at least I have now had some interviews. So lack of substantial income makes paying a huge rent a bit difficult (rents here are about twice that in VA). At least I had someplace to go!!
So I will keep looking for work, work with my wonderful son to figure and learn to stick to a budget, help my wonderful "daughter" with the house and kids where I can, save some money, and rent again from a TRUSTED rental agent/company/person in (hopefully) a few months.
Good news is, Christmas was great!! The first "real" one with the grandkids! They are growing so fast. Ella was baptised on the 12th of Dec. and that was a wonderful thing to be able to see. Ben is quite a young man now. Maiya talks incessantly (did we really worry at one time that she would never talk??), and Cora is a joy -- such a happy baby most of the time. And we just found out there will be a new one to spoil come September!! The household is chaotic at times, but it's a loving chaos and I wouldn't miss it for the world!!
Next step is to get a job, then onward and upward from there!!
So I will try to keep up a little better with this, although as I said I don't know who even reads it. That's okay. It's a good outlet!
We made the trip to "Tekis" -- took 3 days instead of the planned 2, partly because I have a son who doesn't like to get up early, and partly because half way here, we lost a tire off the trailer carrying my truck!! Thank goodness it had 4 and we managed to pull into a hotel parking lot with it. Called Penske, and they replaced the trailer, but we had to wait nearly 3 hours for them to get the new one to us, so we just stayed where we were overnight. We were hoping to get a lot further that first day, but didn't happen. Oh, well. We finally got here, and safely, and that's what matters.
Moved into "my" neat little rental house on Monday (30th). 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, yard, etc. I really liked it and the "landlady" seemed really nice -- young, 3 kids, seemed really happy to have me in the house. It was a 3 minute walk from the kids, no major streets so the little ones could come over whenever with no worries. Had a room "set up" just for them. I was getting settled in and enjoying it until about a month later we came home from a job interview and found a notice from the bank on the door!! After some investigating, we found out the nice landlady (who had oddly enough moved to Ohio before Christmas!!) was 3 months behind in her mortgage payments and had 15 days to catch up or they were going to start foreclosure proceedings!!! K&J talked with several folks whose advice they trusted and the consensus was I needed to get out before I got locked out. So, rented a storage place, nice folks from their church came, moved my things out of the house and into the storage ALL IN ONE DAY. The next day we took enough stuff to K&J's for me to furnish a room (sorry Meg!) and stay with them for now. Of course, the nice landlady denied the "arrears", said her finances were none of our business, refused to refund my deposit because I "walked out" on the lease (of which I never did get a signed copy), and has already put the house on the rental market again! Maybe we did jump the gun, maybe she did catch up, but the trust factor is gone. How could I ever be comfortable there wondering constantly if she was behind again and looking over my shoulder for the bank to come lock up the house?
It is probably a blessing in disguise -- probably should have just moved in here to start with, but hindsight is always 20/20. The job situation did not pan out the way I planned -- still looking as a matter of fact! I guess I thought I'd come out here and just "fall into" something with no trouble. Didn't happen, still hasn't happened, although at least I have now had some interviews. So lack of substantial income makes paying a huge rent a bit difficult (rents here are about twice that in VA). At least I had someplace to go!!
So I will keep looking for work, work with my wonderful son to figure and learn to stick to a budget, help my wonderful "daughter" with the house and kids where I can, save some money, and rent again from a TRUSTED rental agent/company/person in (hopefully) a few months.
Good news is, Christmas was great!! The first "real" one with the grandkids! They are growing so fast. Ella was baptised on the 12th of Dec. and that was a wonderful thing to be able to see. Ben is quite a young man now. Maiya talks incessantly (did we really worry at one time that she would never talk??), and Cora is a joy -- such a happy baby most of the time. And we just found out there will be a new one to spoil come September!! The household is chaotic at times, but it's a loving chaos and I wouldn't miss it for the world!!
Next step is to get a job, then onward and upward from there!!
So I will try to keep up a little better with this, although as I said I don't know who even reads it. That's okay. It's a good outlet!
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